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The
concept of marriage in Egypt is not an easy topic. Certainly
Egyptians seem to have taken mates in what most often appears
to be lifelong monogamous relationships. After the Third
Intermediate period we begin to find ancient "marriage
contracts" that incorporate the phrase shep en shemet (price
for "marrying" a woman) and mostly set out property
rights without elaborating on the act of marriage itself. More
abundant are divorce records that also deal mostly with
property settlements.
When examining ancient reliefs
and statues, it is easy to assume that the ancient Egyptians
marriage was similar to today's institution, but beyond these
visual clues, there is little in the way of documentation to
substantiate this. Little written evidence of either
true marriage ceremonies or marriages as a concept has been
found. Usually there was a grand party associated with
the joining of two people, but we believe it was simply a
social affair and had no real religious or legal bearing.
Traditionally, the term hemet
has been translated as "wife", but is probably more
accurately "female partner". The legal and
social implications of the word are not clear.
Interestingly, the word hi is the male counterpart to hemet
but seems to have been rarely used. However, this is
probably due to funerary text most frequently being related to
men, and so the female partner is referred to and defined by
her husband.
Hebswt is another word
that seems to apply to a female partner, but traditionally it
has been translated as "concubine". However, this
meaning is less clear because in some New Kingdom text both hemet
and hebswt are used at the same time to apparently
refer to the same female. It has been suggested that the term hebswt
might more accurately describe a second or third wife
after the first one died or was divorced.
Of course, our modern, romantic
concept of marriage is a relationship based on love between
partners who consent to share their lives together. But
up until the 26th dynasty, relatively late in Egyptian
history, the bride herself seems to have little choice in the
marriage. In fact, during this time frame most marriage
contracts are actually between the girl's father and future
husband. The girl's father and even her mother had much more
say in the matter then the bride. After the 26th
dynasty, the bride appears to have had more say in her future
husband, and we find phrases in marriage contracts that
indicate a more defined relationship.
Among common people, polygamy
may very well have existed as it obviously did in the royal
class, but if so it was rare. We known from excavations
such as Deir El Medina that the housing of common people
conformed more to monogamy rather then polygamy.
Yet from the 13th Dynasty
(1795-1650 BC) on polygamy was common among kings and some of
the ruling elite. While one principal wife (hemet nesw weret)
was chosen, others were probably taken by the king in order to
assure a royal heir, or cement relationships with foreign
countries or even powerful regional leaders. Kings might
have as many as several hundred wives, and in some periods
other high officials took more then one wife.
Also, the tradition of
brother/sister or father/daughter marriages was mostly
confined to the royalty of Egypt, at least until the Greek
period. In tales from Egyptian mythology, gods marriage
between brothers and sisters and fathers and daughters were
common from the earliest periods, and so Egyptian kings may
have felt that it was a royal prerogative to do
likewise. However, there are also theories that
brother/sister marriages may also have strengthened the king's
claim to rule. It was not uncommon among common people to
marry relatives. Marriage between cousins, or uncles and
nieces were fairly common in Egypt prior to the Greek
period. Interestingly, after the Greek arrival, one
study found that 24 percent of marriages among common people
were brother/sister relationships.
Marriages were most often
between people of the same social class, but their seems to
have been little regard given to race or even
nationality. It was not unusual for a northern Egyptian
to marry a Nubian, or someone even from another country.
Marriage contracts do not generally tell the
age of the parties, but we know from other documents that
marriage almost always occurred after sexual adulthood.
The average age for girls to enter puberty was 12 to 13, and
around 14 for boys. Indeed boys, who had to achieve some
work abilities in order to support a wife and future children,
were usually 15 or over before contemplating marriage.
However, from the Roman period we find documentation of brides
being as young as 8, though most scholars believe that is an
exception and that a more common age for brides was 12 or
older. In royal marriages,
particularly
between brothers and sisters, the parties seemed to be often
much younger. We know, for example, that Tutankhamun
probably married his sister when he was about nine years
old.
It was not all together uncommon for older men
who had usually lost their wife to either death or divorce to
marry very young "women". Qenherkhepeshef, a
scribe from Deir El Medina for example married a 12 year old
girl when he was 54.
Particularly during the early periods of
ancient Egypt, the future husband made a payment to the
bride's father, usually amounting to about the cost of a
slave. Later, this practice was abandoned and later the
practice was reversed where often the father of the bride had
to compensate the future husband for her upkeep.
However, if divorce occurred, the husband was obligated to
continue some support to his ex-wife, usually amounting to
about one third of his earnings.
All of this said, there are many indications
that husbands and wives in ancient Egypt were often happy and
in love. There are many touching portraits and statues
of families including spouses and their children that reveal marital
delight and warmth within the family.
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