By Margo Wayman
Mr. and Mrs. Asliraf were very proud of their new baby boy. They were so proud that they didnt want him to have just any old name. They wanted him to have a long, important and very special name, so they called him Aziz Alim Aahad Ahmed Akram Amir Asliraf. He wouldnt be called Aziz. He wouldnt be called Alim. He wouldnt be called Aahad, Ahmed, Akram or Amir. He was going to be called by all of his names.
One day they wrapped Aziz Alim Aahad Ahmed Akram Amir snuggly in his blue blanket and put him into his baby carriage. They took him for a walk to the park. They ran into Mr. and Mrs. Borak, who were also taking their new baby boy for a walk. "Oh, hello, Mr. and Mrs. Borak," Mr. Asliraf said, peeking in to the Boraks baby carriage.
Mrs. Asliraf asked, "I see youve had your baby too. Whats his name?"
Mr. Borak proudly replied, "Bahir."
Mr. Asliraf snickered softly and said, "How nice. Bahir. You can see we have had our baby too. His name isnt as plain as Bahir. Weve named him Aziz Alim Aahad Ahmed Akram Amir Asliraf. Its such a special name for such a special baby boy."
Mr. and Mrs. Borak looked at each other, then in a huff said, "We like the name Bahir. Its just fine!" and walked away.
Mr. and Mrs. Aslifar continued on their walk. "Who would call their child something as unimportant and short as Bahir?" he asked. He looked at his son and tickled him under his chin.
And so it went. Every time they met someone at the park, or at the zoo, or at the playground, they would snicker at the childs name and walk proudly away with their son.
Aziz Alim Aahad Ahmed Akram Amir grew up very quickly. Soon he was ready to start kindergarten. Mr. and Mrs. Asliraf took their son on the first day of school to meet his teacher. "Good morning. I am Mrs. Muna. I will be Azizs teacher while he is in my class," she said, introducing herself.
"Excuse me!" Mrs. Asliraf interrupted. "Our son is not to be called Aziz. His name is Aziz Alim Aahad Ahmed Akram Amir and we insist that he be called that at all times!"
All through the school year he went by his whole name. While other children were learning to write their short names, like Mona, Moly, Sharif and Youssef, Aziz Alim Aahad Ahmed Akram Amir had to learn to write his long name.
As he grew older, he turned into a handsome young man. Girls began to call him at home. "Is Azim Alim Aahad Ahmed Akram Amir there? Can I speak with him?" they would ask.
When his mother and father wanted him to do something around the house they called, "Azim Alim Aahad Ahmed Akram Amir, come here please."
Graduation night came. Mr. and Mrs. Asliraf were so proud to have their son graduate at the top of his class in high school. The principal handed out the diplomas to each boy and girl as he called their names. "Rashid, Camilla, Omar." But before he could say Aziz Alim Aahad Ahmed Akram Amir , he had to take a deep breath. Mr. and Mrs. Asliraf were so happy. Their son had such a long, important and special name. The other children names were so short and so plain.
After college, Aziz Alim Aahad Ahmed Akram Amir went out to work. He had a hard time writing his whole name on some of the job applications. He finally found a good job in a tall building. One day he invited his mother and father over to see his very own office. They walked down the halls looking at all the nameplates on the doors. They knew they had found their sons office when they saw the gold nameplates on his door. They both read out loud, together, "Azim Alim Aahad Ahmed Akram Amir Asliraf Attorney at Law."
"Isnt that such a special name dear," Mr. Asliraf said to his wife. "I am so proud of our son."
The day came when Aziz Alim Aahad Ahmed Akram Amir met and fell in love with a very special woman. He knew that his mother and father would like her right away. She too had a very long and important name.
"Mother, Father, Id like you to meet my fiance, Miriam Majida Maysa Melek Muriel Myrna Myeshia," he introduced her to them.
Huge grins came across Mr. and Mrs. Aslirafs faces.
At the wedding, when the words were spoken, "Do you Aziz Alim Aahad Ahmed Akram Amir Asliraf take Miriam Majida Maysa Melek Murial Myrna Myeshia to be your wife?" and "do you Miriam Majida Maysa Melek Murial Myrna Myeshia take Aziz Alim Aahad Ahmed Akram Amir Asliraf to be your husband? I now pronounce you husband and wife." Mr. and Mrs. Asliraf and Mr. and Mrs. Myeshia cried with joy.
Mr. and Mrs. Asliraf were so proud. Both their son and his new wife had such long, important and special names.
A year later Aziz Alim Aahad Ahmed Akram Amir and Miriam Majida Maysa Melek Murial Myrna had twin babies, a boy and a girl. Mr. and Mrs. Asliraf were so happy. They went right over to the hospital to see their new grandchildren.
"Aziz Alim Aahad Ahmed Akram Amir, I do hope you and Miriam Majida Maysa Melek Murial Myrna are going to name your children long, important and special names," Mrs. Asliraf suggested.
"Oh we are," said Miriam Majida Maysa Melek Murial Myrna, holding up her new baby girl. "This is Lina."
"And this is Lufti," said Aziz Alim Aahad Ahmed Akram Amir, as he held up his new baby boy. He smiled at his wife, and they both felt proud.